Change.

Times change, people change. I've changed, you've changed, we've all changed. You're different from the person I met a year and a half ago. All of you, and so am I. It's just so hard sometimes. So I'd rather lock myself up and watch from a distance. Sigh, "Love photographs because they never change, even if the people in them do" I stumbled upon some of those photos earlier, memories sweep past my brain. Fuck.

Evidently, I got caught cheating in my History 2 paper. And along with being caught, I pulled my friend into the dark icy waters too :'( GUILTY DIE PLEASE. :( and she was crying all day long :'( KY FORGIVE ME :'( IM SORRYYYY

BoyxBoy Romances

Barely a week in and I'm already gasping for air. FTCHSTWPTP (Fuck the CHS teachers who prepare the papers) a term me and sista coined because CHS really sets the bar high with a flurry of hardcore exam papers on after another. I guess I'm failing my add maths again this term, huh?

Anyway, instead of studying, I've been reading on Wattpad like its my job and there's no more tomorrow. Gay romances for the win.

Some of the great ones:
1. I Like Your Batman Underwear
2. I Love You, Stupid
3. Loving My Best Friend
4. Fighting Against A Heart
5. Picture Perfect
6. Step Brothers
7. There's A Jock In My Bed
8. High School Scandal
9. I Tempted Him With A Kiss
10. The New Boy
11. He's Got A Love Like Woe

Yeah, these are the good ones, not to say the others aren't. But when I read these I feel like crying because they're so emotional. Romantic or sad, or both. BAWL MY FUCKING EYES OUT. Oh and the steamy sex scenes. #megusta.

Hahaha. Okay, tomorrow biology paper and Chinese paper. One I like, one I don't like as much. Chinese paper 2 is okay I guess.

:(

I feel so lonely.

Hell.

First of 13 days of hell. Okay maybe not hell. Exams aren't everything. Not to me they aren't. While people are studying their brains off, I'm taking my time. Nonchalant arrogant prick you say? Well I don't give a rat's ass about you either.

My brain cannot memorize stuff. It just can't. I remember what sticks and that's that. My short term memory can last for a maximum of like two days. Screwed.

Oh well, looking very forward to my post-exam destress session with my mates. :) I think we should make it like a tradition to go out after every exam.

When do I tell them? When is the right time? Someone help me..

Messed Up

I'm so messed up. Someone take me away from this infernal world to somewhere better. :(

Mid.

So, the mid-term exams are right around the corner, and by right around, I mean in three days. Hurray! Pfft, I am totally unprepared, and look at what I'm doing, three days to the exam and I'm still on the computer. God I'm pathetic. But I can't see to focus on my studies recently, not that I actually have in the past, but still.

What I AM looking forward to is the school break after the two and a half week of torture. Shit dude, I'm totally going to flunk. No, I can't let this go on. Tomorrow I shall start something. AT LEAST, I will revise a little. The journey of a thousand miles starts with one step. Yeah baby!

So anyway, I've been outstation yesterday and this morning, in Mentakab where mom teaches line dance. And much to my surprise, Mentakab has a new mall. And a decent one too, the first one I've seen. With a huge and well-stocked departmental store cum hypermarket, a Popular bookstore, many eateries and even a cinema.

Me and my little bro went to catch the midnight showing of Battleship last night. And I tell you, it was epic. Fantastic movie, with the amazing CGI and sound effects to match. Also, they had a pretty hot cast too. Especially Taylor Kitsch, damn he's fine and has a fucking sexy voice. Also, Alexander Skarsgard. Mmm, hot. Not to mention, RIHANNA! /squeal Rihanna's acting debut, sure she could have done better, but it's Rihanna people! (And the crowd goes wild, okay maybe just me) and Brooklyn Decker too. Meshell says she got some fine ass boobs, so okay. Epic movie with intense action. TAYLOR AND ALEXANDER ARE SO HOT. UNFFF

Okay, ignore that. Wait, don't ignore that. Go check out their awesome hotness. I am so going to ask dad to buy the True Blood series (Alexander is one of the main characters, eeee! How could I have not known this!) AND HOW COULD I NOT KNOW THAT TAYLOR KITSCH IS JOHN CARTER?! Must watch that too! I'm going to go insane again.

Please don't let me have a mental-breakdown/depression episode again during the exam seasons, I mean, during the holidays it would be fine. But not during exam period. Shit, I'm so dead. SO FUCKING DEAD. Oh well, I'm not one to dwell on my own misery, although I actually do sometimes, depends on what it's about. Like two days ago. Although I don't really want to talk about it. Let's just say, arguments are bad for mental health, even if you're just a listener.

Insanity.

RUBEN JORGE YAP JU VEI GET THAT FUCKING BOT OFF. THE DAMN COMPUTER. ITS MESSING UP THE WHOLE THING FOR FUCKS SAKE.

And I'm on the verge of tears while choking on them. What the hell is wrong with me? Yesterday I barely had appetite for dinner, I had to make myself eat do I won't get gastric pains or whatever. And I was so flustered while doing my homework.

I'M GOING TO HAVE A MENTAL BREAKDOWN SOON. SOMEONE HELP ME. I CAN FEEL MYSELF SLIPPING.

Well at least I still can think straight now. Today I didn't go to school. I wasn't that sick but I wasn't feeling right. I was ill with something, not a disease. Insanity. And I didn't want anybody to see me so worn out. So, I had to fake my sickness very exaggeratedly. Oh yeah, and I lost my voice. FUCK MY MIND